It’s been ten years to the day since my ex walked into our house, told me he was leaving, clarified that he was leaving with my friend, and then turned around and walked out. How do I know this? Because here’s the heartwarming text I got today:
“B______, it seems a good day
for me to sincerely apologize
to you for my part in what
happened to you ten years
ago today. I acknowledge
that I am partially responsible
for the mess your kids are in
and fully understand the pain
and anger you must have felt.
For that I am truly sorry.
Anj”
I suppose she could have taken the level of her “sincerely” lame, texted apology down one more notch and broken it up into a few tweets:
@heybeergut it seems a good day for me to sincerely apologize to you for my part in what happened to you ten years ago today #ifuckedyouyourkidsandyourhusband
@heybeergut I acknowledge that I am partially responsible for the mess your kids are in #icanthandlethemhavingarelationshipwiththeirfather #insecure
@heybeergut and fully understand the pain and anger you must’ve felt #actuallyidonthaveareferenceforthis #butasafriendifeltyoudeservedit
@heybeergut for that I am truly sorry #andijustbrokefivethousandtweetsandhavefournewfollowers #word #<3
@heybeergut Anj #onecrazymotherfucker
Seems a bit more accurate.
HEY BEERGUT!! 
What…!!!!! could this be true????
Sad but true.
I don’t even know what to say! Who does something like that? A texted apology? And a very generalized one at that. That’s nothing but an ego salve to be able to say “I’m a good person. I apologized. I wasn’t trying to hurt anyone.” I don’t blame you for how you feel. And I loved your Twitter remix. Funny!
I couldn’t agree with you more, Kitt. I could have commented a lot more, but wouldn’t know where to start or where to end!! She’s a special piece of work.
She sent it on the anniversary…ten years later? Bitch. I would have felt like she was rubbing it in. Who needs that crap? Your twatter (I mean twitter) version is much more like it. Was there a spontaneous thunderstorm in your area yesterday? Sounds like there should have been a lightening strike near her.
Oh she was rubbing it in alright. Drawing my attention to a date that I otherwise would have let gone by without a thought. I guess it’s more meaningful to the two of them since they celebrate it as their anniversary. I guess she’s not THAT sorry 🙂
Nope. Not sorry at all. She’s got issues.
A texted apology, eh? On the impersonal scale, that’s just a few notches above the use of a telegraph. Wow.
Morse code would have at least kept things interesting.
True. Plus, it has that cool Steampunk vibe.
Those are masterful tweets. Hashtaggin’ like a boss.
#imliketotallysorrylol
#totally!
Wow! Love your tweets, but hate what they did to you! I’m sure you could think of a witty retort for her text — I can think of a few, but nothing that I should write here! 🙂
Thank you for visiting/following my blog — and sorry for what you’ve been through!
Thanks for reading. Sorry for what you’ve been through and continue to go through. Your poem really captured your struggle.