Hello lovely and wonderful bloggers! It’s here! Our Cougar national holiday, and we are pumped to spend it behind a computer screen without push-up bras, thongs, high heels, bling or makeup. If you are wearing any of the above no problem, we appreciate your enthusiasm.
THIS IS THE COUGAR DEN, ONE LOVE LIKE-IN
Our goal is to have all of our followers, occasional visitors and one-time drops ins hit the “Like” button today on our blog, and hopefully chime in with comments to boot.
We like you and want you to like us. But not just us. We want people to “like” each other, saddle up, settle in, and get to know who and what is out there in the fabulous blogosphere.
We want to help spread the love around on this divine February 14th. We want to reclaim it from Godiva, Hallmark, Victoria’s Secret and FTD. And that was really hard to say by the way, Victoria’s Secret is like our second home. That’s how much we want to make this about good vibrators vibrations and mutual pats on the buttocks back.
And so to followers, to people that we follow, to people that drop by every so often or if today is your first time, in the spirit of blogger reciprocity, we want to start by giving and then ask you to offer up something in return.
Our give to you is HUGE and something that we feel quite indebted to. Something that seems to stir the imagination of idle active minds, as it did ours. Something that is titillating in its elusiveness. Something that hasn’t been seen by anyone except Gwyneth, Jennifer and Angelina since 1997. This anatomical mystery on the minds of so many kept up our site visits in the early days of only 3 followers, made us feel extremely “liked” and dependably filled the down-time between our (unbelievably awesome) posts. We owe it big time, so thank you mythical penis. Dear bloggers, we also thank you for your continued support, and for tirelessly putting up with references to our phallic legend, for that we are grateful.
So on this day of LOVE we are thrilled to gift to you, gals (because you deserve it) and guys (because everyone knows about your penchant for comparison), without further ado, that which has brought thousands to our doorstep and most certainly stirred the ire of those who didn’t exactly get what they came for the first time, it is, in all its glory, dug up from the depths of a feminist’s closet, wisely saved for its awesomeness, exploiting a moment of really bad but really, really good judgement, right here in the Cougar Den on none other than Valentine’s Day, here it comes, that which Helen and Denmother have affectionately coined “Old Faithful,” wrapped up in a big giant chocolate-teddy-bear-wine-roses-lingerie-sappy-ball-of-love rolled in nuts (sort of literally), at long last, Brad Pitt’s penis!
Take your time, its our Valentine’s gift to you:
What the…???
Shit. It isn’t quite clear how this tragedy has befallen the first annual Like-In, Denmother and Helen were enjoying a couple of cold ones, one beer led to another, and in our defense cougars aren’t exactly known for their technical wizardry, especially when drinking. This could be just another shitty Valentines Day, more broken promises, high expectations shattered, but fear not fellow bloggers, because we have something else up our collective sleeves. It is a Like-In after all.
To salvage the day and the intent of our One Love throwdown, we’re going to offer you something a little less voyeuristic but far more relevant and warm and fuzzy (debatable) than Plan A. Ready?
We’re going to each tell you something about ourselves that we think you might like – or inexplicably experience a strong adverse reaction to – and then we’ll ask you to do the same in the comment section. The idea is that we can all claim a legitimate excuse to like the crap out of each other today and get to know each other just a wee bit more. Yay!!
So,
Denmother: I have a dachshund named Gus that’s wracked up no less then 8 biting incidents – all men – and I love the heck out of the dumb ass.
Happy Valentine’s Day blogging buddies! Grr.
Helen: Last year my husband gave me a Swiss Exercise Ball for Valentine’s Day (I’m going for the pity “like” here, this was Denmother’s idea anyway)
Okay, your turn. Let’s all get better acquainted. Love is in the air. Hit that Like button then make us Like you!
HEY BEERGUT!! 